3Jack Makes Fun of His Baseball Cards - Ver 1.0

[Richie3Jack]

I used to play baseball....a lot. And I collected a bunch of baseball cards. I saw these things the other day and just laughed and started thinking stupid thoughts about them and how goofy they looked.

I guess I've always found 'traveling circuses' fascinating. Y'know, those parts of entertainment where the participants travel from town to town, have their devoted fans and live in their own little world of entertain and then getting loaded afterward...then traveling to the next town.

Pro Wrestling has that 'traveling circus feel.' I thought about 10 years ago the NBA had a traveling circus feel to it as well as the ratings were down the tubes, but fans would treat ballhogging, no defense douchebags like JR Rider as if they were gods.

Nothing had the traveling circus feel like 1980's baseball. I imagine a world where players hit seedy strip bars at 2 in the afternoon before a 8pm night game, play, get done and start doing bad road coke with a stripper at some bar with a generic name like 'Shooties.' Then get up the next day and try to hit a 3-1 slider off Kent Tekulve for the go ahead run.

So I decided to randomly pick baseball cards and make fun of them because, well I can.

First card picked is Cesar Geranimo.





One trait of 80's baseball players is the outrageous amount of moustaches. When people think of moustaches they usually think of:

1. 80's porn stars.
2. 80's cops
3. Stupid moves about 80's porn stars or 80's cops.

Well, the moustache and the 80's MLB player is severly neglected.

Another thing I love about 80's ballplayers is the rather pedestrian stats. According to Wiki, Geranimo was named to the Cincinnati Reds Hall of Fame. This for a guy who's highest single season OPS was .795. He was a 4-time golden glove winner, so I wonder if he was flagging down everything in centerfield as I can't imagine a ball getting past his moustache.

Interesting note, Geronimo was the 3,000th strikeout victim to Nolan Ryan and Bob Gibson...so he's probably in their HoF as well.






3JACK

[nothere]

For some reason when i look at that card i hear the Village People singing.

[secondary]

Richie,
I am righ there with you. In fact this came to mind when I read this.

Someone just gave me a Strasburg "Platnium" edition as a gift. As if I will live long enough to cash in, or remember to.

Good topic.

Attachments:

[jonnygrouville]

A number of years ago, I used to have a kind of Mexican bandit style moustache reaching down to my chin (sometimes joining up with my sideburns for the full Victorian landlord look).

One winter, a mate of mine was meant to organise our snowboarding. He left it too late to book so none of the other guys could make it at such short notice. I found a travel brochure, called up and took two spots on the first thing they said. Turned out really well. Good flights, nice place, good snow.

We found out on the third day that it was resort gay week. Needless to say, he made me shave off the moustache.

[cloran]

Aug 24, 2010 1:55:14 GMT -5 jonnygrouville said:

A number of years ago, I used to have a kind of Mexican bandit style moustache reaching down to my chin (sometimes joining up with my sideburns for the full Victorian landlord look).

One winter, a mate of mine was meant to organise our snowboarding. He left it too late to book so none of the other guys could make it at such short notice. I found a travel brochure, called up and took two spots on the first thing they said. Turned out really well. Good flights, nice place, good snow.

We found out on the third day that it was resort gay week. Needless to say, he made me shave off the moustache.

Suuuuuurrrrrrrre... we believe you.

[jonnygrouville]

You might. Thousands wouldn't.