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Post by rohlio on Apr 8, 2011 18:47:27 GMT -5
I am wondering if anybody else struggles with this or is aware that they do it.
I have come to the conclusion that I am an anti grinder. Not because I want to be that way, but it seems to have been a repeatable pattern for me that has become easy to go to.
When I am hitting the ball well; particularly iron play, I seem to stay focused and interested throughout my round. Even if I am not putting it well or scoring particularly well. AS long as I am hitting the ball solid I am invested in my round.
Other times I may be scoring just fine but feel I do not have command of my golf ball. Driver doesn't feel good, shape is not what I want, ball feels heavy, etc. When this happens I just seem to check out. I quit really investing myself in reading my putts, trying to chip it close, making good decisions, and just overall caring about what happens.
I cannot count how many times I have been Even or 1 over through 4-5 holes and I just don't feel good about my ballstriking that day, maybe I scrambled the ball in the hole so far. At that point rather than keep pushing myself to grind it out despite my bad striking I just seem to pull back emotionally and all of a sudden I am on the easy bogey train.
Obviously this is very detrimental to my golf as even when I was playing a lot I was known as a guy who could back up a 70 with an 85, or follow my disinterested first round 83 with a nice smooth 71 ( my biggest gap ever was 91 before lunch and 71 after lunch during a 36 hole one day event).
Does anybody else struggle with this? I mean even if I am hitting greens if the ball didn't turn the way I wanted a few too many times I just seem to get so discouraged. Nobody else would even think I am struggling but to me I feel one step away from quitting.
Watching people who are always competitive I am convinced that they love getting the ball in the hole and I love hitting good golf shots. How on earth do you change that? I guess the fact that I am aware of it now, whereas in the past I wouldn't even have been able to identify this tendency is growth, but I really wonder how long it will take me to change this about myself.
Oh well I guess growing in areas like this is why I love golf anyway.
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Post by bentshaft on Apr 8, 2011 22:14:16 GMT -5
rohlio
You are my golfing brother (albeit at a higher level)...
I have all the same feels...all the time...
bent
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Post by rohlio on Apr 8, 2011 22:41:29 GMT -5
rohlio You are my golfing brother (albeit at a higher level)... I have all the same feels...all the time... bent One of the great things about golf is that it can be played at any level and experienced together. The brotherhood is strong in this game and I would tee it with you anytime. If you are like me and you think the real game of golf is about inner mastery then who is at a higher level has nothing to do with score  So the real question becomes how to break this cycle? I think I will really try to focus in on this mental process and see how early I can detect it, so that I can envision a different way of processing the stimuli of "subpar" ballstriking, and make that my goal for the day. I believe in setting goals that are attainable regardless of external circumstances. I have to believe that the ability to give best effort regardless of circumstance is already inside of me and then I simply must do it when the situation is presented. I think the problem for me is that too often I don't make a conscious choice because I don't even notice the question. Basically I don't notice myself starting to quit because I am not staying mentally in touch with my emotions. So for at least the next several rounds I get to play I am going to monitor this. I will let you know how it goes for me. |
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Post by secondary on Apr 10, 2011 12:10:13 GMT -5
It is funny, I had to wait a few days to comment on this and make sure I felt what I thought I felt. I think I am the complete opposite of you! Granted I am a hack, worst 10(trending the wrong way!) in AZ. Horrible ballstriker. I believe one day I might become average, one day. Going into a round, like here in an hour, I know that I won't be able to get off tee, outside of a hybrid. My approaches will be pulls with a few just being plain short and poorly struck. Yet I look forward to playing because I REALLY like to scramble. Probably a taste born out of neccessity, or else I would have quit long ago, but I do, I like to scramble and frustrate my partner. I know he is going to be consistant pretty much everyday. He hits fairways, plenty of greens, and misses lot's of putts. He can't stand to lose to me because of my "ugly" game. So maybe it is just a cop out for me to not practice more, but I am not sure what I would even do if I was in control for a whole round? I do want to get to your level one day Rohlio, but for now, I seriously enjoy the scoring aspect the most. Funny game that we all see it differently.
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Post by rohlio on Apr 10, 2011 12:56:11 GMT -5
It is funny, I had to wait a few days to comment on this and make sure I felt what I thought I felt. I think I am the complete opposite of you! Granted I am a hack, worst 10(trending the wrong way!) in AZ. Horrible ballstriker. I believe one day I might become average, one day. Going into a round, like here in an hour, I know that I won't be able to get off tee, outside of a hybrid. My approaches will be pulls with a few just being plain short and poorly struck. Yet I look forward to playing because I REALLY like to scramble. Probably a taste born out of neccessity, or else I would have quit long ago, but I do, I like to scramble and frustrate my partner. I know he is going to be consistant pretty much everyday. He hits fairways, plenty of greens, and misses lot's of putts. He can't stand to lose to me because of my "ugly" game. So maybe it is just a cop out for me to not practice more, but I am not sure what I would even do if I was in control for a whole round? I do want to get to your level one day Rohlio, but for now, I seriously enjoy the scoring aspect the most. Funny game that we all see it differently. I play with a guy just like you. Everyone is wired differently. He LOVES chipping in on people, I think he misses the green intentionally sometimes just so he can chip one in to put the pressure to his opponents. He digs scoring. He is definitely getting more out of his game than I am. If you watched us on the range or compared tee to green stats you would think I would beat him by 7 strokes a side, but we play even in the long run, because the worse he is playing the more he focuses and scrambles. One of the reasons I play with him and have even caddied competitions for him is ( besides the fact he is great to be around) is that I want to understand how he thinks and feels around the course. This is one of the big differences in my opinion between consistent winners and losers. I don't mean this in a horrible way about myself but I have never been a winner. I am talented, I am hard working, I am loyal, I am honorable, but I don't win at a lot of things I do ( I am consistently in the top % of my endeavors, but rarely #1). In short if I combined my game with your attitude I would be a much better player for it. So that is what I am going to try to do. Thanks for the input, this thread is meant to be cathartic more than anything. I hope other people will be able to change the things they don't like about their golfing persona and I hope I will be able to change mine, or at least learn how to be more effective with what I have. |
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Post by bentshaft on Apr 11, 2011 10:50:07 GMT -5
agreed---great post...I have to think on this...
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Post by mchepp on Apr 11, 2011 12:51:50 GMT -5
I always feel that the best players at my club find a way to score well whether they are hitting it good or not. There any plenty of guys who play well when they are hitting it well, but there are a rare few who know how to score even when not at their best.
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Post by secondary on Apr 11, 2011 13:34:20 GMT -5
Glad you started this post. After yesterday's round, I just want to reitirate, I REALLY WANT to be a good ball striker, I do. I have used every work, family, kids, excuse in the book, but when you see swing threads like Greg's you realize that if you REALLY wanted it, there is a way. I need to stop tinkering with swing theories and just settle on one and go with it. I know Iteach is right, I know Denny is right too, I REALLY like S&T, but mixing them all up doesn't seem to work  Part of the reason I like to scramble is that as long as the club is around waist high, I seem to have pretty good mechanics. Something just goes haywire when I play full swing? I guess I just need to play executive courses and par 3s !! Yesterday, I threw up on the front, scrambled around on the back well enough to win it and the Nassau!! 2 out of 3 ain't bad, but I would like to crush him every once and awhile actually play well start to finish. |
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Post by rohlio on Apr 12, 2011 20:11:36 GMT -5
So I played 18 today, the details of which can be found in my round posting in the other folder. However since my goal for playing was to monitor and observe what I have been talking about in this thread I figured I would address the mental and internal aspects here. This was a great round for doing this since my ballstriking was not on today, rather I should say my alignment sucked, I was hitting the ball pure, just pure in the wrong direction. The front 9 was a struggle as I got on the bogey train and had a hard time getting off despite hitting it well enough to score. I noticed myself at first fighting back against my desire to get frustrated. I was telling myself, just hang in there your game will come to you. After going 4 over through 4 I found some freedom in my mind and just let myself continue to play and give best effort. By the 6th hole I could feel frustration slipping in. I had missed a few birdie putts really close to the holes and I still just felt like I couldn't line up to the ball. When I bogeyed the ninth hole due to a particularly awful 2nd shot after a perfect drive ( stuck the club in the ground) I felt very strongly a desire to say "awww...who cares you can't win em all". I didn't forcefully argue with myself about this, I just decided to pay attention to the desire to feel this way arise and to allow it to pass. I started off the back 9 playing better, still not striking it great and still struggling with line, but I opened with 3 straight pars on holes that are pretty easy to put up a big number on. I left three birdie putts on those holes within probably a total of 5 inches from the hole. I then lulled again making a few very poor swings and saw my mood kind of darken, just the inevitability of realizing I would have to birdie the last 4 holes to make a decent round of it. I decided to try to make sure that I continued to give best effort on all my shots coming in, I played the last 4 holes E. So no collapse coming in, which is always a good thing. All in all I did much better recognizing my mood and choosing alternate modes of thought rather than familiar (and non successful) ones. I would venture a reasonable estimate that I saved 3 shots on my round by being better aware of this and not crucifying myself over it, but just finding a way to work through it. I did notice that my frustration seemed to grow as my + to par number grew closer to my cap, once I passed it ( on the 5th hole...  ) , is when I started noticing my "ahhh round is shot, not hitting it well, who cares" type attitude to seep in. When I decided to continue to give best effort despite that, I played better than my pre over cap frustration had allowed for. Perhaps that is an area of exploration that would be beneficial. Thanks for listening to me ramble. I hope it helps someone else. |
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Post by bentshaft on Apr 13, 2011 13:32:52 GMT -5
rohlio
I am wondering...Correct me if I'm wrong, but I think I have read that you have little time to practice anymore...
Also that you used to practice quite a bit?
Not trying to put words in your mouth...
But for me, I practice a LOT...I want (need) to be a good ballstriker...I'm not even sure why, but I am driven to do so...
So when I have a round of poor ballstriking, it frustrates me quite a bit to know how much time and work I have put in with such poor results. Don't get me wrong, I am getting better, but I do lose focus on the course after a few chunked short irons in a row.
I admire secondary's grit, and will have to use that attitude more often.
I am working on the short game more often lately as well...It's almost theraputic after having been a range rat for so long!!
The idea of competition is something that we can talk about later...
Just yammering now LOL
bent
bob
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Post by rohlio on Apr 13, 2011 15:03:31 GMT -5
rohlio I am wondering...Correct me if I'm wrong, but I think I have read that you have little time to practice anymore... Also that you used to practice quite a bit? Not trying to put words in your mouth... But for me, I practice a LOT...I want (need) to be a good ballstriker...I'm not even sure why, but I am driven to do so... So when I have a round of poor ballstriking, it frustrates me quite a bit to know how much time and work I have put in with such poor results. Don't get me wrong, I am getting better, but I do lose focus on the course after a few chunked short irons in a row. I admire secondary's grit, and will have to use that attitude more often. I am working on the short game more often lately as well...It's almost theraputic after having been a range rat for so long!! The idea of competition is something that we can talk about later... Just yammering now LOL bent bob I used to practice at minimum 5 days a week. Now I am lucky to get to the range once week. I hear what you are saying. I have clearly and distinctly identified a thought pattern, which is not helpful to me, that involves equating the amount of time I put in to "Deserving a particular result". Since I get to practice and play so much less now it is easier to accept making mistakes, however it doesn't mean that if I should go back to practicing often that I wouldn't then be tempted to feel like I deserve a result again. The key to this for me, (at times I have been successful with this and other times less successful) is disassociating the two things. I mean, I had to learn that time spent working on something needed to become it's own reward, and not become something that detracted from my game. I did my best with this when I viewed the hours I spent working as a joyful pursuit that allowed me to have confidence over a shot. The result of the shot was beyond my immediate control and related to my practice but not it's immediate result. Hope that helps a bit. |
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Post by rohlio on Apr 20, 2011 20:12:18 GMT -5
I feel like this thread should be retitled "Confessions of an Anti-Grinder" Played 9 holes with some friends yesterday, all good sticks. Started off bad, stupid bogey on the first when I Missed the green from 150 and pitched to 10 feet and missed the putt. Followed by a lost ball on my second hole when I swear I saw it land. Had to go back and retee on a par 5. I was 5 over through 4 and felt like launching a club into the woods. I had been trying the whole time to just settle down and give best effort, but I decided after number 5 I wasn't going to give up and coast in. I bet the guy who was playing the best that day (-2 through 4) That I would beat him over the last 5 holes. We bet lunch on it. I knew I didn't have it ball striking wise but I was going to figure out how to score anyway. I really didn't get the ballstriking back. but I started playing really smart. Hitting at center of greens and playing conservative with my alignment on the tee. I actually had 4 legit birdie putts on the last 5 holes and only made one of them to come in -1 for the last 5 holes. He pared in and I got lunch out of it. I have never been so proud of a 40 on 9 holes, because I guarantee the me that started this thread would have shot a 45 at least. I just wasn't going to let my mind use it's old pattern. I still didn't hit the ball well but I certainly gave my best effort with what I had. I told my buddies when I was done how proud I was of myself while I ate my free lunch The guy I beat the last 5 holes said he was stunned. He didn't think I had a chance the way I was hitting it |
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Post by cloran on Apr 20, 2011 20:51:47 GMT -5
That's a great story Rholio. There was a time when I swore I was bipolar on the golf course, and it all depended on how the first few holes were played. It wasn't until I had a few rounds like the one you just described that I was able to get better at controlling my emotions.
I'm far from perfect at it still, but better. In fact, I now use poor starts as a kick in the ass to get going and I've played some of my best rounds after very poor starts.
Lately I've struggled with the opposite end of the spectrum. If I start off well and get a few under through the first 3 or 4 holes I start thinking about setting the course record, shooting 59, ridiculous crap like that... and inevitably I come back to reality in a big way.
It's very difficult to actually play one shot at a time. It doesn't help that I can't get on the course that much. I think the more you can play the easier it becomes to control your emotions.
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Part of the reason I like to scramble is that as long as the club is around waist high, I seem to have pretty good mechanics. Something just goes haywire when I play full swing? I guess I just need to play executive courses and par 3s !! 
) , is when I started noticing my "ahhh round is shot, not hitting it well, who cares" type attitude to seep in. When I decided to continue to give best effort despite that, I played better than my pre over cap frustration had allowed for.